Monday, April 27, 2009


So I decided to take off work and go on a training ride with my fellow 'cross teammates. Unfortunately for me the heat (in April, wtf?!) was around 94-98 according to my 'puter. Do you remember when you were a kid and their was always one kid who would be taken off the soccer field via ambulance for heat stroke/exhaustion? That was me. I cannot do the heat. I can ride when it's 0 degrees out but anything above 85 and I wither away like a angry, bitching flower.

Needless to say I sucked today. I think I cracked leaving Jamie's driveway. Seriously before we hit the first climb I was already feeling it. The first climb by the way is 22%. 3 hours and 5,600 feet later I was in a real bad place. My heart was racing no matter how slow I went. My skin felt cold and clammy. I couldn't think straight. I went into robot mode and just pedaled slowly and made it back home. It was by far one of the worst days I've ever had on a bike. The other three would just pedal away from me and there was nothing I could do. Push it any harder and I'm pretty sure things would have went black and I'd wake up in the hospital. Just like when I was a kid.

I can't wait until the fall. I'm already tired of summer.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Lower Providence crit

Remember what I said last week about loving crits? I take it all back. I hate crits. I especially hate all the fat hangers on who show up for the 10 seconds of racing they do. I was having a good week on the bike but had to take a few days off due to being a normal person with a job and family. So that sucked. But I was hoping that feeling would carry over into Sunday's race. It didn't really. I mean I felt as I was one of the stronger guys in the pack (at least one of the stronger guys who was actually dong any real racing) but I didn't have that "unstoppable" feeling in the legs.

Let me start from the beginning. I signed up for the Cat. 4thinking it would be an easy win. Wrong! I totally forgot about all the guys who ride around in circles for 40 mins saving it all or the sprint. ANYWAY... The whistle goes off and some old dude (pretty strong too. Gave me some hope for my future old self) takes off and gets away pretty easy. No one chases, he stays out for a few laps finally pops and comes back in. He tries a few more times to his credit but never gets away. Another guy goes off and some due starts yelling about "he's a Cat 1 cyclocross!" repeatedly. So what the hell I rarely hear the word cyclocross so I chase him down. This dude tries to get away about 10 more times every time the same way. I'm not sure what he was doing. He seemed pretty strong I was actually hoping he would get away but he seemed to sit up after he came to he finishing straight. Weird... So we are racing and Jamie comes to the front and does some work but kind of seems like he is just playing around having fun. He felt good so he tried to get in some breaks. I tried putting on a one man block every time Jamie went out but Obviously that didn't work. Cole was tucked safely in the pack saving it for the sprint or for if I got away. I tried several times to go off in a break and every time I'd catch the break only to urn around and see 40 riders stung out on my wheel right behind me. SO with 4 laps to go I said "fuck it" and gave it a real dig and got clear. I got a nice gap and held it for a lap before it started dwindling. I was hoping someone would come up and join me but no one did. Actually some dude did come up right before I got caught and said "let's go man!" so I let him get in front to give me a break and as I did I noticed my speed was slower then when I was alone. I yelled at the guy o go faster but he pulled off and I took off again. This time feeling tired as I'd been alone for 2 laps and with 2 laps to go the pace was much faster. I was caught by the first corner. So I sat up and went straight to the back where I almost got spit out. Took a deep breath tried to recover for a lap. Went back the front. Some douche dives into the corner in front of me slams hard on the brakes because I guess he got scared and sends the rest of the race scrambling not to eat shit. Asshole... This screws over Jamie and Jason as they get pushed to the back. They never recover from that and they finis behind me. Sucks too because I could have led someone out. I was able to get around said dipshit and sprint up the back straight to get near the front. I'm about 10th wheel coming into the sprint and I got nothing. I'm still beat from the pitiful solo break and the back straight away sprint. My goal quickly becomes not to crack before the line or get passed. I think 1-2 dudes inched passed me and about 10 guys I hadn't seen all day are in front of me sprinting their ass off.
SO this is why I hate crits. If you're reading this and you are one f those guys who just sits in I'm not ragging on you. That's the nature of this style racing. And sitting in and letting guys like me put the pace on because we think we can crack the field or get away only serves you better. You're smarter then me for sure. I don't fault you one bit, if I was a sprinter, and I'm so not, I'd do the same thing.
So bring on the road races! I'm going to miss Tour De Ephrata but I should get into every other road race or long circuit race. And then it's payback.

Thursday, April 9, 2009


I've never liked crits. That was until tonight when I dominated the local Thursday night crit. I went on about 8 breaks with minimal effort. On the last 3 laps when the big boys finally came out to play I grabbed their wheels easily. The feeling o flying past everyone at close to 40mph with a group of other really strong riders and not feeling like you're going to crack is an almost super human feeling. I almost thought I was going to ride away with this thing when me and some Elite dude came into the last corner with a little bit of a gap on the main field. Of course they caught us right in front of the parking lot and I had no sprint and had to sit up as everyone went flying by.

Still... I crushed that thing tonight. Would have been nice if the rest of my team could have been there. Or Geronimo. Or someone. I have no one (except Jamie but I don't think he was at the very front) to witness my one night of crit greatness.

I have no idea where these legs came from but I'm loving it.

1st race of the year

So last year I did one cat. 5 race ad decided I hate road racing. Or at least that it just wasn't fun to me. First, I must explain one thing about me. Since birth I've only liked things that I'm good at from the get go. If I couldn't pick it up quickly and be the best I didn't want anything to do with it. So last year wen I did a shitty Cat. 5 road race and I missed the break and ended up chasing for 45 mins only to catch the break right as the sprinted for the finish I put my thoughts of road racing on the back shelf and focused on what I live, cx. Plus roadies are elitist uptight pricks anyway.
This year I'm on a team and as a sign of good faith I decided to do some road races. So screw Cat. 5's and their replica jersey wearing, sketchy riding asses. And while I'm at it screw Cat. 4's too. Why? I don't know just because I'm an elitist uptight prick I guess. So I decided to do a 3/4 race and throw down with the semi big boys. Everyone goes from cat. 5 to cat. 3/4, right? So I line up Saturday in the freezing cold. Being at race weight and having hardly any body fat makes for some chilly mornings. I wasn't shivering I was convulsing. But I digress. The group finally takes off and I warm up. The pace was nice and speedy which pleased me but my legs weren't feeling very strong. I went to the front to try ad get positioned for a break (by the way the wind gusts that morning were 50mph). Just trying to gt to the front I almost cracked. So back into the pack I went. Legs feeling like crap. The speed one lap was 34mph across the finish, the next time through it was 24mph and the next it was 19mph. It was all over the place. It didn't matter because I felt like crap. FINALLY on the 2nd to last lap my legs woke up and felt like they had been all week. I move from the back to the front and looked for our sprinter. I got behind him on the last lap and I couldn't get around because we were pinched on the right against the shoulder of the road. So there was no lead out fr me. Going into the final meters it opened up into a group sprint and I pulled a killer sprint out of my ass (I can't sprint to save my life). I was passing dudes like they were sitting still. So I'm looking for more gears and realizing I didn't have any and as I am coming on the front line of dudes these two jerk offs in front of me sit up and stop pedaling I couldn't get around them and I ended up having to brake hard as I approached the line. WTF? I could of actually came close to winning this thing... I'm sure the other 20 guys that came across the line with me had similar thoughts but still. So it could have been worse. Ended up 18th out of 70 dudes. Not bad for moving up a few Cats.

Still looking for that win though.
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