A gift from the gods

I will be posting more on this new found obsession. Let the vommiting begin!

Snow blows

When I worked at a ski resort, snowboarded everyday, and owned a snowmobile I thought snow was awesome. Especially this much snow. Now I ride a bike primarily on the road. I derive all my self satisfaction from this and only this. Not saying that Luke or Jenny don't make me happy because they are my world. But I'm talking about self satisfaction and not that type either, perv. So when I cannot ride my back I feel like shit. Pure shit. Trainer you say? I've submitted to the idea. I guess I will get on it tomorrow and the next day and the next day... Snow sucks.

But hey I'll look hipster cool sweating my ass off on my trainer in my new cap.

OK fine...

I'll actually write more then one line while I wait for Jenny to finish reading her book and get me a beer.

So 'cross has ended and we are in the middle of that "off season" where everyone talks about taking it easy but then heads out to do 6 hour rides in 20 degrees. And to be quite honest I love this time of year almost as much as I love 'cross season. No one is freaking out about peaking for this race or that. People aren't pouring over their power tap wattage trying to crank out 100 more watts. And best of all people are drinking real beer. Case in point I've been drinking Left Hand's "Fade To Black" stout. It easily gets me drunk in one beer. That's right, one beer.

Almost as good as dark porters and stouts is that I've been going out and doing these long "I'm not really training right now but I'm going out for 100 mile of climbing..." rides and I'm loving it. Spirits seem to be much higher this year as do abilities, mine included. Who could ask for anything more?

iPhone = Blog killer

I haven't posted to the blog since I got my iPhone. Coincidence? I think not.

Or not...

10 hours of sleep and I feel worse. Nose is completely blocked now. Might just bag it. Oh well.

And how angry was that last post? Swear much?

Stupid Bikereg

You had to put up the current PACX standings didn't you? F'ing a-hole, thanks... As you can see I was quite happy to end my season last weekend. Now I see that I'm somehow, by some fucking miracle, in 4th place? WTF is that? I sucked balls all season and I'm in 4th place?! Uh.... ok. So now I have to go to Marysville and try to kick the shit out of some poor bastard I don't even know. I'm not worried about Gunnar. Either I'll beat him by a small margin or he'll beat me by a small margin. Festa is doing the A's so that just leaves this one dude. There are pro's and con's to this weekend. Pro: No one knows who the fuck I am and that I've been riding sick and busted up all season. So I won't be marked. Con: I just got another cold. Some virus that makes it hard to swallow and it hurts to breath. That being said, since when does 'cross care about whiny bitches and pain. I can ride through a sore throat. Pro: No one is showing up for this race. Should make for a clean race. I just have to stay ahead of the enevitable d-bag who is going to crash on the 1st lap. Con: Remember I said it hurts to breathe? Well that means I haven't been on a bike since Tuesday. Hopefully I can squeeze in some openers sometime tomorrow night.

So who knows what's going to happen. All I know is I'm coming back into form and if this cold bug doesn't sop I should have a clear shot at winning this thing. Still pissed about Mercer...

And I wanted to sit at home and drink some good porter this weekend. Damn it!

Oh and one unrelated note. I saw this bumper sticker (and almost all bumper stickers are annoying but this one...) on my way home the other day. It said this country was founded on Christian beliefs not Liberal... something. You get the point. There is so many things wrong with that fucking sticker I don't know where to begin. First off this country was founded on the lives/deaths of the lower class. This country survived because our lower and middle class is willing to pick up a gun and take a bullet. It also is founded on the genocide and oppression of it's native inhabitants. Just like every other empire to have ever ruled this planet. Why do people believe everything they are told on their ultra conservative radio/church/circle jerk meeting?

High note

Not that anyone is reading this so I can pretty much say whatever I want. This blog shit is like an online diary for public viewing. I never kept a journal (manly term for diary) so I have no idea why I feel compelled to now. But whatever, I digress.

Back to your regularly scheduled bike rant. My nightmarish season has come to an end. BUT!! not without a silver lining. Let's start with Saturday's PA State Champ cyclocross race. I somehow got a callup? Maybe because the top 10 guys in the state didn't show, except for Gunnar. The course hadn't changed a bit for better or worse. I'm pretty sure they kept the tape up since last year. SO the start is uphill and paved. A few dudes went real fast out of the gate and blew up before we go to the top. About 10 of us rolled away from the pack but not at a race winning pace. Everyone was marking Gunnar and he was just taking his time. Such a change from last year. It's good to see him coming into his own. Although I do miss beating him. Anyway, after about 2 laps the pace was lifted and I got popped due to a side stitch. (I'd give both nuts for a cure to this problem) Jason E. went flying by me and caught the break. That was cool to see. But back to me, I was ready to step off the bike and call it a day. But I was riding with this Dynaflow guy and after some back and forth I dropped him. So that gave me some confidence back. Side stitch still lingering I tried to maintain my pace without letting anyone catch me. But there was a nice size chase behind me trying to reel me in. Two of them flew off and caught me. One dude from Bicycle Therapy kept going at an incredible speed (compared to mine). The other faded and latched onto is wheel for the last lap. The kid didn't complain or ask me to work just pulled me around the whole last lap. Just for that I wanted to let him come in ahead of me but as we were coming around the bend to the finish he slowed so I just said, "fuck it", and started to sprint. I was in my little ring and completely spun out 20 meters to the line. The kid beat me for 12th place fair and square by about 6 inches. Good for him. I was actually happy to have sprinted with someone for once. My whole season I've just rode across the finish alone.
Sunday, Phelps race in Malvern. This race got no love from the 'cross community last year and again this year. Shame for any 'cross race to have low numbers. I know plenty of dudes who sat at home on Sunday. Not sure why. I recognized about half the guys most of them I've beaten all year (not trying to be arrogant just honest) so I wasn't intimidated. But Gunnar was there so I was happy about that. I like racing against people I know and who are faster then me. Makes it more challenging. I lined up next to the kid who out sprinted me the day before. Nice guy not sure who he races for. Whistle blew and everyone took off. I found myself very quickly 2nd wheel. I don't like going out first. For many reasons. One I don't like setting the early pace because I usually blow up and two just by being 1st or second means I'm going to hard. SO I stop pedaling and let 5 or so pass me before we hit the first corner. I watched Gunar eat shit and sounded like he broke something. I was bummed but suddenly that fucking kid came out of no where and was back on my wheel. Then he quickly came around and went clear pulling some other guy who I vaguely remember from a few road races with him. We were going through the one off camber section when some breakaway dude stopped dead in front of me and I had to dismount and run up the hill. I hate running so I was pretty pissed about that. Apparently my anger shot me clear of everyone and I found myself catching up to Gunnar and this dude. As soon as I caught them Gunnar attacked and I went with dropping dude in yellow. This is towards the end of 1st lap. By lap two we had a ridiculous lead and were not in any danger of getting caught. So we slowed up a bit, and just enjoyed the lead. With 2 to go Gunnar attacked. I wasn't sure why as he didn't need to. I kind of dropped him by accident a few times and I wasn't sure if he thought I was trying to get away. Anyway he went and gapped me by like 30 secs with ease. I caught back up o him with a 5 sec lead with 1 to go. Then he went again. Same thing, but I could close it down and I congratulated him going into the final turns. Good race and I settled for 2nd place. I wasn't so much happy with the 2nd place as I was with keeping up with Gunnar. Something I haven't been able to do all season because of all the shit that's happened. Like I told my wife, I'd come back into form for the last race. I was right. It was a good day. My wife and son were there cheering and I could slow up and wave at them all while riding at the front with ease. I've missed that.

So I'm going out on a high note. That's a wrap. Going to ride the shit out of my mtb this winter and just have fun before gay road racing starts. I'm already planning on 2010 'cross season.

Thanksgiving Day Ride

Great time on the new SS 29er.

Video courtesy of Geronimo

Thanksgiving Day MTB Ride 2009 from Geronimok on Vimeo.

No news good is good news

I've got nothing to post. Really, I've got nothing. I'm trying not to be negative as has been brought to my attention. So my update is this; I've raced and had fun and had some horrible (I'm trying) results. But I really don't care. I've given up on this cyclocross season and have just decided to ride my bike and have fun.

But the good news is my legs are coming around. States is the last big race so I'll try to pull something out of my ass for that one. Trying to stay motivated but it's really hard when you race like shit and feel like shit. I tried the 5th St. race an I was getting lappped. Mostly because I couldn't keep my bike upright. Another mental blow is to find out that I can't handle my bike in greasy mud. Geronimo gave me some good advice on how to corner in slick mud like that. God knows when I'll be able to do that tough. I' love to practice it over and over until I get it right. Maybe mother nature will bless me with Belgian weather for the rest of the year. But as far as 5th St. goes it was indescribable. It was pitch black, 55 degrees, and pouring rain. I chugged a beer mid-race, swallowed some dead cold fish with gummy bears and berries, and was chased by a costume bear. Most people were there just having fun. Some dudes were racing all out. Which made it weird to be in a race where some people just wanted to have fun and other people wanted to dominate it like it was a usgp. I would have liked it more if everyone was just goofing off and drinking beer but trying to race half assed. Or maybe not. I don't know. That's why it was indescribable. I'm not sure how I feel about it. To make sure, I'm going to go back and race it again. Maybe if I'm not such a fucking downer Geronimo will car-pool again since I had no idea how we got there. This time I'll bring good beer.



What I am excited about is riding my 29er. I rode it all of once. Had a blast and it's been collecting dust ever since due to races every single weekend. Thanksgiving is the next chance I'll have to ride it. Should be fun. But in one week 'cross is over and I can plan a weekend out to Blue Marsh and ride the hell out of that bike. I'd like to do some SS mtb races in 2010.


So that wasn't completely negative was it? Probably shouldn't try to write something positive when a family member is dying, Flat broke before Chistmas,my legs feel like trembling weak noodles, and I'm exhausted from playing with Luke.


So here I'll end this shit on a high note. I wasn't kidding about the bear...

Perspective

I've been gearing up for this season for awhile. Even before last season ended. And this season, so far, has been an utter disaster. At first I was confused, then angry. Then someone I least expected to set me straight told me that if I was taking cycling so serious that I wasn't enjoying it anymore that maybe I should rethink riding a bike at all. This is supposed to be fun.

Agreed.

I've also received some great advice from a good friend on how to recover from what seems to be my main problem of over training.

So it seems as though my new Bianchi Sok Singlespeed 29er came late but right on time. This bike is nothing but fun. So this weekend I'm going to do just that. I'm going to take it out with Martin and remind myself why I ride bikes.

Love:

FAIL

That about sums up the 'cross season. Nittany I rolled a tire while floundering in about 10th place. Whirlybird was a amateur hour. Crashed while in 3rd place half way through lap 1. Wouldn't matter anyway since I got side stitches for the next 45 mins. Crashed around corners, tied up in the tape, tripped over barriers. I rode better in my first Cat. C race.

Really need to get my fucking had in the game. Not sure how to get there though.

This pic sums it up... FAIL

Sok it to me

Me so horny for 29ers. After much deliberation I've decided to sell my Santa Cruz Blur. It was like a fwb. It was good while it lasted but it just wasn't meant to be. Mainly I was sick of clogging up the derailleur and cursing and screaming in the middle of the woods all winter. Seriously.... bullshit. It's off to a nice home in CA where the guy said he bought it to "ride around with his young kids." Ummm... ok. You bought a all XTR race sled for $1550 so you could ride with your kids in the driveway. Whatever dude. Good luck to you. Can't imagine what his kids are riding.

So I'm saying goodbye to derailleurs, goodbye to shifters, goodbye to rear suspension, and goodbye to 26" wheels. Hello to 29", single speed, hardtail, pure sexified mtb goodness. I'm going to ride the shit out of this thing ('09 SS Bianchi Sok).



Only problem is I'm getting this at the beginning of 'cross season. So I'm going t have to forget it's there for 3-4 months. Right... Totally going to screw up my head for 'crosss season. Focus! FOCUS!!!

Burnt out *EDITED*

I think I may be burning out. Not sure how as only ride 300 miles a week lately. I've scaled back over the last month to try and fend off this ugly burn out beast. One day my legs feel ok and the very next I can barely turn the pedals over. That and I've been training alone which sucks. Having ADD doesn't help the situation out on the road. It pretty much goes like this in my head:
"Ok sprint for the next 60 secs, GO!!"
"GO GO GO GO!!!"
"Ughh this sucks.."
"What it's only been 24 secs?!?! Fuck me.."
"Hey I've never seen that house before. Hmmf.."
"I wonder how much a house like that costs"
"I'll have to look it up when I get home"
"Yea, right I'll never remember"
"Fuck I stopped sprinting, damn it!"
"Ok rest fora min and try this again, idiot"

So that's why I can never get a good block of training in. And the guys I ride with are all either too slow or too fast that I don't want to burden them with having to pull me along for 80 miles so I don't even ask. Yea I know there are much bigger problems in the word but this is mine, ok. I need to find some fast local dudes who can put a hurt on me without dropping me.
Whatever it's 'cross preseason I need to change my training plan anyway.
Good thing there is Grass Track Monday's. Kelly Cline is m new hero. He put this simple impromptu race on and it's more fun then a 3-way. That and I also got the word from G that there is going to be cx practice on Tuesday coming up soon. It's all coming around. Now I just need to get the legs working again.
Maybe I should take a week off and get fat and drink beer?

**EDIT**
New Rule, don't blog after a bottle of wine and a pain killer. I'm a gigantic ass. First off the people I ride with are not slower then me at times they are much stronger then me. I just think I'm faster then everyone after downing a bottle of Cab. Secondly, I would never take a week off to get fat. While it is true I've been drinking alot more lately (mainly due t the fact that this is the few weeks of the year when I'm not racing or training) I'm not going to stop riding. Although it wouldn't hurt. I'll just ride like a normal person for a week to give the legs a break. I also noticed I swear a lot when I'm drunk. Ok a lot more.

True Love

I may have said this before but I love Cyclocross. No I mean it, I really really love it. And while I’ve only known about the sport for a few years now I’ve actually loved it since I was a little kid. We just didn’t call it ‘cross we called it riding our bmx bikes on the numerous homemade tracks that we had built in the woods (all of which have been bull dozed and paved over). We used to take our bikes back in the woods with wheelbarrows, shovels, picks, and saws. We’d spend all summer building up burms, obstacles, jumps over big pits. We even had steep kickers dug into the side of the hill. And if you didn’t get the right speed coming out of the corner it became a runup. We were constantly falling off our bikes and running with them to get back in the race. Sound familiar??
‘Cross adds in the sadomasochistic element. Even before I wrestle for good starting position, my stomach is churning and turning realizing the impending doom. I’m not sure if it’s cold sweats or the 40 degree air that has my skin crawling. “Why am I doing this” is usually a thought that goes through my head moments before the gun goes off. That’s when I remember as I unleash my best sprint. The whole time grinning from ear to ear. Or at least in my head I’m grinning like I just got away with something. The stomach settles and spend the next 45 mins trying to drop or chase somebody through the taped course.
Did I mention there is mud, blood, and beer all being mixed together? If you’re lucky it will start raining at a ‘cross race and the attitude usually turns from trying to kill the guy behind you to laughing at the racers sliding all over the course as the race magically turns into a muddy slip-n-slide. You suddenly turn back into that 12 year old kid in the woods laughing and playing with your friends in the mud with your bikes. Everything is right in the world just for a few minutes.

I love ‘cross.

Here it comes….

ToLC

Tour of Lancaster County(ToLC):Course: 55 miles with about 600ft climbing per 10 mile lap. Nice long flat section through a shaded valley alongside a creek followed by a steep but short climb. Then some nice rollers followed by 2 wicked descents hitting 49.8 mph (p.s. I saw a nice Garmin at the bottom of the one descent. Hope that dude recovered it). Some more rollers out in the 90 degree farm country of Lancaster which leads back into the shaded valley. Finish is a separate climb that starts at about 10%-12% and then levels off to about 4% for the finishing sprint (500meter short climb).
Did the 3/4 ToLC on Saturday. Started the day off badly by having a real bad bout of the runs. Spent most of my morning on the porcelain god praying for an end. Got to the race and spent my pre-race in the port o jon. Made it to the start line without soiling myself thank God.
So that should sum up how I felt physically. As the for the race itself it started off slow with a few guys going off the front. There were a few guys patrolling the front that weren't on a team and had us going ridiculously slow. So I went to the front to try and get some guys working to pick up the pace. I figured the breaks weren't going to last with 50 miles still to go and some short but steep hills in the way. Of course no one would pull through as I lifted the pace and so I just kept it at a fast tempo but nothing that would burn me out. We hit the first climb and my teammate went pedaling by me with another guy. So my team and I immediately went into blocking mode. We slowed the pace down for the next 2 laps to a laughable sped. Until finally the other teams decided enough was enough and swarmed us. By then the break had a few minutes and with good luck would last to the end. I spent lap 3 trying not to defecate myself and swallowing a small amount of puke. Yo-yoed off the back a few times. Considered quitting. But then I realized this is almost as painful as 'cross and I never quit that. So I went back to the front and whined to my team hoping to get sympathy. I got none.With 2 laps to go the Local Shirks team drove hard at the front but didn't really bring back the break that much. Although they did launch a guy off the front who ended up catching the break somehow. Kudos to him for an amazing ride. With one lap to go every guy was trying to break away and of course no one is letting them with the finish a few miles away. I sat in and waited for the final "climb"/sprint. Moved my way up to the front when we hit the base. I think 2 guys got ahead of us at some point as I saw some guys pedaling way ahead of us. Then with 200m to go no one had made a move so I figured that if I sprinted now and got last place then at least I tried. So I hit it as hard as I could. My teammate grabbed my wheel. Two other guys were able to come around me right away but I was able to hold off everyone else including my stomach.All in all a fun race. Bad day for me. But worth another shot at it next year.Gratuitous pic of me about to collapse as I cross the line (that guy on my right really was trying to pip me for some reason. I gave it one more hard crank to hold him off)

Part 2

So where did I leave off? Oh right, mile 5... So Jenny drives me to Martin's place with the replacement bike on the roof (did mention I married the greatest woman ever?). As I'm swapping out the pedals I remembered the C'dale only holds one water bottle. It's going up to near 100 degrees (mind you it's been 81 degrees for the past two weeks until this day) and I'm only going to have one bottle. So I stuff one in my jersey and pray or frequent water stops.
We get through PA and into DE and it doesn't get any flatter. At around 3,000 feet of climbing in just 60 miles I start worrying how I'm going to do 170 miles. Then comes Newark. I've been all over the world and I can say for certain Newark is one of the worst towns I've ever been to. This place should be napalmed on a daily basis until it's just a burnt spot on the map. Shithole would be a good way to describe it. It was like riding through a white trash version of east LA. Of all the things that went wrong this day Newark was the worst one.
After pedaling through said shithole we finally make it to the canal. The only way to get over the canal is to ride on 896, a local highway. That wasn't all that bad. It wouldn't have been bad if it was the only highway we had to ride on. But after all the DE bike route signs had been torn down we found ourselves riding down rt. 15 which Martin was sure would bring us out "somewhere around where we want to go". Great.... At one point rt. 15 was closed and we had to detour back out to a highway. This was starting to get annoying. We got back onto rt. 15 when that stooped being rt. 15. We ended up on random back roads wandering south. At one point I knew we were in trouble when Martin said not to worry "as long as we keep heading south" at which point I looked down at my computer and noticed we were heading West. Martin simply replied. "Oh... Well then we need to turn left." We were approaching 6 hours in the saddle and we had no clue where we were or how to get where we were going. A call to my sister, a google map search, and we started heading in the right direction. A few more calls, a flat tire, hearing Martin say we have 4 more hours to go and I threw in the towel. We weren't going anywhere fast, DE roads are ridiculously bad when it comes to being marked, and I couldn't bear the thought f arguing with my sister and mom about this trip. So I called Michelle (sister) and had her drive up and pick us up in some hick town. By the way, if you ever want to have a good time, get dressed up n spandex and hang out at the only gas station in a rural DE town. People gave us looks like we had two heads. To be fair there were some cool kids who gave us direction to Dover.
I can honestly say I will never ride a bike in DE again. F* that!

F Delaware Part 1

So Martin and I decided to ride down to Rehobeth despite the forecast. I should have turned around and cancelled it at mile 3 when my chain dropped.
And let me go into this chain thing. I took my bike to the Bike Barn (now Phoenix Cycles)when I first put this derailleur on because it wouldn't shift into my 12 ring for some reason. I had this happen on the bike when I first assembled it and Roy at the Bike Barn had fixed it in just a few seconds, no problemo. This time I took it in and the other guy "fixed" it. The entire time trashing me (although I didn't tell him it was me) for my adjustment of the derailleur. Saying who ever did it was an idiot and if I rode it like this (which I was) that it'd throw the derailleur into the wheel (which I obviously hadn't). Whatever dude, just fix it and shut up. So he "fixed" it and charged me a couple bucks and I was on my way. Soon after that I was riding and shifted into my small front ring and my chain dropped. WTF? Why did that happen if the guy was just "fixing" my derailleurs?? Whatever, maybe it was a fluke and I never need to use my small ring anyway. Well then Nebo came and I did need to use my small ring and guess what my chain dropped twice in that race and I had to bail on the 4th lap (albeit I was dropped on my own lack of fitness anyway and ready to quit).
So at mile 3 on my way to DE I drop my chain as I shift into the small ring. "Damn it!" Ok settle down it won't happen again if I shift delicately. Approach another hill at mile 5 and slowly down shift into the small ring and "BANG, KAPOW!!" my chain drops and also gets wrapped around the rear cog and rips my rear derailleur right into the rear wheel. Yea, way to go fuck face. You're a hell of a mechanic. Telling me I had it all wrong. Well mine may have been ass backwards but my chain never dropped and I didn't ruin a brand new Dura-Ace derailleur. Fuck you ass hat! I'll be paying you a visit soon to tell you what a great wrench you are.
Luckily I didn't break the frame on my Tarmac or I'd be in jail for Assault and Battery on a mechanic. So I called Jenny and had her bring out my spare bike (yes I have spares, thank God). Well Jenny never loaded a bike onto the bike rack and I tried to calmly in my non-calm state explain to her how to put it on the car. She seemed to understand how it worked (best wife ever by the way) after me yelling at her for a few mins. Then I receive a call a min later from her frantically telling me the bike had fallen off of the rack and onto the car. AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! What else could go wrong??

Luck

For the last week it's been beautiful. Low 80's slight breeze from the Northwest, and sunny. Tomorrow I'm riding 150 miles or more to the beach with Martin and suddenly it's going to be close to 90, humid, raining, and winds gusting from the south. Awesome...

Club rider

I've said in the past how annoying club riders are in their faux kits and their loud mouthed antics on the starting line. This year I've joined a club and have put on the wannabe pro looking kit hoping that being on a team would provide me with the adequate training I've been missing. It has not. To the team's defense they do have weekday rides in the AM. However, they are in Philly and I am not. Even if I was, my work schedule would not allow it. The only thing I've gotten out of being a club rider so far is endless emails about people's race reports.
So I was thinking of dropping the team thing at the end of this year and spending my money on something useful like a coach. A quick search of local coaches set me straight. $200-$350/month!!! WTF? Who can afford that? The sport is expensive enough just to buy the gear and race entries. I'm not saying these coaches aren't worth that. I just can't imagine paying that kind of money for anything. I thought my cell phone bill was too much money a month...
So maybe I'll just go back to being a independent who gets his training tips from books, magazines, and the net. I love this sport but the cost to be competitive is just too daunting and depressing. At least with running all you needed was a pair of shoes every 6 months.

Google Maps

Too long I've relied on other peoples training routes. It has however worked out good as I've gotten to do some amazing routes and amazing local climbs. None of which I've ever remembered. Which makes me want a Garmin even more then before. So yesterday I decided to try and devise my own route using gooogle maps. This was after searching mapmyrides for a local rode an finding nothing worth riding. At least not in the area I wanted to ride. So I put together a nice short 2.5hr ride that would drop me off at the in-laws.

I found out one bad thing about Google maps... it's completly inaccurate! Street names aren't what it says they are. So I had to guess where to turn. I didn't do the mileage pedometer thing so I just guessed based on memory. Luckily I guessed right. Or close to it anyway and found my way. The other thing Google doesn't display is when a road goes from paved to completely washed out gravel roads. That was a nice surprise.



So I think I'll start memorizing those beautiful routes other people have led me on and go from there. Trying on my own using an online map is clearly not the way to go.